Archive for the ‘Brangelina’ Category
Filed under: Brangelina, Jennifer Aniston
In my weird, twisted mind, I imagine the tabloids have a dark dungeon — although I guess all dungeons are dark? — okay, just a dungeon where the editors cackle evilly — although I guess all cackles are evil? — okay, just cackle as they Photoshop cellulite dimples into Posh’s inner thighs and plot the latest Brangelina article. And for those articles, they have a pre-determined list of 101 ways to inject Jennifer Aniston into them, so the triangle lives forever, not unlike Kirk Douglas.
We have now arrived at #56 on that list:
Jennifer defends …
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Filed under: Brangelina
Feel that rumble under your feet, fellow Americans? That’s not an earthquake… that’s the herd of paparazzi running to Chicago to snap their favorite brood, the Jolie-Pitts, who just landed (via private jet to their waiting SUVs, much to the chagrin of Al Gore).
Shiloh must have been drinking some monster protein shakes on that plane, because I swear she’s doubled in size since the last Messiah Sighting. And it looks like Maddox had a few too many… don’t worry, buddy, I like to put back a few on long flights, too!
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Filed under: Brangelina
The latest reported spat between Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie isn’t about her weight or overseas orphan addiction.
Turns out, it’s about domestic politics.
You see, Brad is a Barack Obama supporter, while Angie — who I would have taken for a Hillary gal — is a fan of John Edwards. According to Life & Style, tensions have been so high that Angie even threw a glass of wine in Brad’s face over the upcoming presidential election.
How very Joan Collins of her!
“They got into a huge fight …
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Filed under: Brangelina, Celebrities
A game much like “Waldo.” Only they’re hotter. And, I presume, richer. And not as keen on the horizontal stripes (although Angelina apparently may want to reconsider)…
Anyway, wonder no more…
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have whisked their clan away to Marthon, France, where they have rented a castle for a brief vay-cay.
Zahara, 2, was seen feeding Pax, 3, kernels of corn yesterday while an assistant/nanny watched the pair play in a tent with toy spatulas, buckets and colanders. Meanwhile, Brangelina were spotted riding their own motorcycles into the castle …
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Filed under: Brangelina, Celebrities
New Weekly magazine reports that Angelina Jolie has become so skinny, that she’s afraid she’ll never be able to conceive another baby.
So-called “insiders” say the actress is increasingly worried her extreme weight loss might endanger her health and prevent her from adding to her family — and destroy her relationship with Brad Pitt in the process.
You would think Nicole Richie’s situation would give her hope. But alas…
Sources say after months of being “bony,” the star has slipped into a deep depression about her weight, …
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Filed under: Brangelina, Jennifer Aniston
Jennifer Aniston has reportedly told her new boytoy, British model Paul Sculfor, that he’s better in bed than ex-hubby Brad Pitt.
Yes, indeed, a tabloid reports that Jen has been bragging to her friends about Paul’s “impressive bedroom skills.”
A source close to Jennifer tells Star magazine: “She’s left Paul in no doubt that he is the man for her. She even let slip that he’s better in bed than either Brad or Vince!”
Thus concluding today’s “news item” that Paul totally planted.
Stay tuned for next week’s National …
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Filed under: Brangelina
In a move that will fuel the never-ending “Husband Stealer” v. “Baby Hater” debate…
Celebrity Babylon “caught” Brad Pitt’s mom Jane swinging by the Malibu pad of her former daughter-in-law Jennifer Aniston two days ago — with the use of Brad’s security team.
Wow. Jane must have been in dire need of a cup of sugar. (Well, that and some advice on the latest jeans.)
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