Archive for the ‘Totally Sober’ Category
Filed under: Paris Hilton, Totally Sober
Barron Hilton, little brother of Paris and Nicky, is carrying on the family tradition by getting arrested for DUI in Malibu at 8:30 AM this morning.
According to PageSix.com, the 18-year-old allegedly ran into a garage worker with his car as he careened into a 76 gas station off the Pacific Coast Highway. Although the worker was not hurt, he was knocked to the ground and insisted on calling the cops.
Uh, YEAH!
“The Mercedes lost control as it was turning into the gas station,” the worker said. “Barron got out of the car …
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Filed under: Celebrities, Totally Sober
While Eva Mendes leaves Cirque Lodge, where she was being treated for cocaine use and “self-esteem issues,” Kirsten Dunst has checked into the same rehab facility. This comes on the heels of a report that Kiki was acting “erratically” at Sundance.
Kirsten’s rep has not yet returned any calls. So in the meantime, Kirsten can feel free to use Holy Candy’s Stock Celebrity Rehab Statement:
______________ has made a positive decision to take care of his/her personal health and proactively work on his/her drug/alcohol issues. The actor/singer/director/pet monkey appreciates your well …
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Filed under: Totally Sober
Hermione may be the Queen of Spells, but might I suggest a charm called Antiliquoris (Hangover-Banishing Spell)? Just combine aspirin, V8, a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken — and POOF! Counters the effects of excessive peach schnapps that afflicts many teens.
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Filed under: Totally Sober
CUT TO: Three minutes later. Ashlee grabs Pete’s cap and hurls in it.
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Filed under: Totally Sober
A TOTALLY sober… ummm… James… uhhh… Franco… *GIGGLE*… recently talked/grunted to MTV about his upcoming projects in an interview that ended with James finally asking, “Can we cut? This is getting stupid,” and walking off.
I LOVE that. I’m going to start employing that subtle tactic when I get stuck with the most obnoxious person at a party. You know, the person who has to “one up” everything you say? ME: “So I’m old friends with the hostess.” OBNOXIOUS ONE: “Well, I’m BEST friends with her!” ME: “I went to Sydney …
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Filed under: Amy Winehouse, Totally Sober
You know those songs you love to sing along to, but you only know every tenth word and incoherently grunt the rest of it? Well, that’s the approach Amy Winehouse took at the MTV Europe Music Awards last night — only she didn’t know every tenth word.
“They tried to make me use a consonant, but I said ‘no, no, no’…”
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Filed under: Totally Sober
Awwww. It’s nice to see Kate Moss cleaning up her act now that she’s kicked that bad influence, Pete Doherty, out of her life. That’s right, keep your head up, Kate! Um, Kate…? Hello…? Yeah, okay, just keep it down then. Whichever you prefer.
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