Archive for the ‘Fame - Ain't It a Bitch’ Category

Filed under: Fame - Ain't It a Bitch

Sadly, Daily Mail missed its opportunity to use yet more clever whale-related puns with “… but still HARPOONS the females admiring his sizable BLOWHOLE and MOOBY DICK.”

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Filed under: Britney Spears, Fame - Ain't It a Bitch

Other clever headlines under consideration included, “Britney Spears Reveals Unsightly Tree Trunk Legs” and “Gimme More Cellulite:  Britney Spears’ Shorts Fail to Hide Her Dimpled Thighs.”

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Filed under: Fame - Ain't It a Bitch, Headline of the Day

Call me psychic, but something tells me the Daily Mail is going to make quite a few appearances in this column. For more about poor Chunkler, er… I mean, Chandler’s “bloated and stubbly current appearance,” click here.

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Filed under: Fame - Ain't It a Bitch

Yes, you read that right — G-LARD - iator!   Ha, haaaa!  Discarded gems included “Porker-ella Man,” “L.A. Corpulent” and “American Gut-ster.”

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Filed under: Fame - Ain't It a Bitch

Shame on you, America! Next time, the Daily Mail and I expect you to wear a Zac Posen cocktail dress when you grab a Wendy’s Spicy Chicken Sandwich with your friends.

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Filed under: Fame - Ain't It a Bitch

Well, his wrinkles may have “nowhere left to hide,” but he plays hide the salami with Catherine Zeta-Jones every night, so he’s doing something right.

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Filed under: Fame - Ain't It a Bitch

OMG, a 51-year-old actress has cellulite! Hold the front page!

What I want to know is, how long did it take the crack Daily Mail team to come up with “Cellulite and the city”? Very clever, Daily Mail. I tip my massive bikini bottoms to you.

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