What I Think Her Breath Smells Like:  Joan Van Ark

Filed under: Breath Smells Like...

joanvanark-2708.jpg

Virginia Slims, the not-so-delicate touch of a syringe, Urban Decay’s Pina Colada White Shimmer Lip Gloss and embalming fluid


Posted by Candy ♦ February 7, 2008

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20 Responses to “What I Think Her Breath Smells Like: Joan Van Ark”

  1. martini lover

    wtf happened to her?? and gin and tonic!

  2. Julie

    My god! How can she leave the house looking like that with those tarantula eyelashes! Man, she used to be so pretty….

  3. kathleen

    this is what heidi montag is going to look like in the not-too-distant future.

  4. Vern

    And Lucifer’s Dick!

  5. Jane

    Ew! :O
    Moth balls and formaldehyde.

  6. Aine

    she looks like she dunked her face in an acid bath.
    eeeee…

  7. Bee Hind

    Go get another procedure doll.

  8. Jenn

    We all will get old…Amen… The question is, will we all get old gracefully? If you are old…ROCK IT!! If you are old…don’t try to compete with the kids….

  9. shewearsred

    holy shit! that totally freaks me out.

  10. She is beautiful.

  11. Bee Hind

    She smells like White Shoulders perfume, Orange Tic Tacs, and Fleet Enemas.

  12. omj

    Why do her lips looks like Britney’s vagina?

  13. Bee Hind

    Because they’re greasy and wrinkled and see very little daylight?

  14. Give Valine a break. Abby did this to her!

  15. Life

    Where is the Burka when you need one???

  16. Don’t they have agents or something, who let them know before they take surgery this far?

  17. Jo Jo

    It’s so sad to see celebrities who won’t/can’t age gracefully, then they look so odd and scary.

  18. It's British Bitch

    Bee Hind: point of information - Brit-Brit’s lady parts see rather too much daylight, witness the many horrific upskirt shots. Shudder.

  19. Pak31

    Kathleen—-this is what all of the celebs who get too much plastic surgery are going to look like when they are older. It’s really sad and I hope she’s happy. She should be the poster child for why NOT to get plastic surgery and age gracefully and naturally.

  20. nursecookies

    smells like….cocaine, Abreva, and a touch of barfed-up barbeque potato chips. With a dash of martini, hold the vermouth.

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