Amy Winehouse is De-NIED!

Filed under: Amy Winehouse

amywinehouse-rejected.jpg

Amy Winehouse will not attend this Sunday’s Grammy Awards, as planned, because the American Embassy in London has rejected her visa application.   Holy Candy’s sources say they were forced to do so because the United States has already exceeded its crazy quota.  (See:  Britney Spears; Pamela Anderson; Andy Dick.)


Posted by Candy ♦ February 7, 2008

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15 Responses to “Amy Winehouse is De-NIED!”

  1. Ron

    How sad!

    Well, at least she can stay in the UK and have another sandwich. ANYTHING to beef her up a bit and take away the JUNKIE look she sports.

  2. Fuck! Now how am I supposed to see one of my role models in person??? It’s enough to drive me to more drinking!

  3. martini lover

    her hair was probably too big to fit on the plane anyway.

  4. Julie

    Yea, we have enough “celebrities” in rehab as it is. We don’t need to start importing them, too.

  5. Adam Smith

    Martini Lover WROTE:

    her hair was probably too big to fit on the plane anyway

    This is patently untrue.

    I have seen Amy Winehouse getting on and off numerous forms of transport.There is documentary evidence everywhere to support my case.Although I admit that I am not an expert in aviation engineering or technology,it is clear that both her and her hair could fit quite comfortably on any Aeroplane,both private and commercial.

    Furthermore,as we all know,hair is flexible.
    Amy’s hair could easily be bent or shaped in such a manner as to allow her easy access into most spaces,that other normal sized human beings find accessible.

    Clearly you have problems in understanding basic perspective.I have met Amy,(through a mutual friend),and can assure you that she is an average sized woman,not the giantess that you obviously imagine her to be.

    There is absolutely no sarcastic intent in this comment.This is just an attempt on my part,to clarify what appears to be a perceptual misunderstanding.

  6. martini lover

    all good points, adam smith. but i would argue that while ~hair~ may be malleable, rats’ nests, such as the one that’s taken up residence on on amy’s head, are not so easily bent or shaped to allow entry onto the plane.

  7. Jane

    I love her for her talent. :) Get well Amy, we the people who live in this world filled with talentless hacks need you!

  8. Adam Smith

    Martini Lover WROTE:

    all good points, adam smith. but i would argue that while ~hair~ may be malleable, rats’ nests, such as the one that’s taken up residence on on amy’s head, are not so easily bent or shaped to allow entry onto the plane.

    This one could go on for hours.

    Unfortunately,however,I have to go to bed early, in order to make some appointments I have tommorow.

    So I’ll let you win.

    For now.

  9. Dearest Adam Smith,

    Her hair would not fit on an 8 seater bush plane. I’ve been on many of these air vehicles, and let me tell you, even if they pulled her hair off and counted it as one piece of luggage, it would probably get delayed to another flight, given the weight restrictions–and there is also flammable material dangers to consider.

  10. scamps

    This whole thing doesn’t make much sense to me. The UK is part of the Visa Waiver Program with the US, and unless the stay was going to be longer than 90 days, then a visa isn’t needed.

  11. bv

    If she’s “an average sized woman” than somebody, I’m not naming names, is the 800 lb gorilla in the room.

  12. It looks like I can no longer say I don’t know who Amy Winehouse is. Knowledge at times is overrated.

  13. Adam Smith

    bv WROTE:

    If she’s “an average sized woman” than somebody, I’m not naming names, is the 800 lb gorilla in the room.

    Come on,name names.

    I’m curious to see who you expose,in your penetrating light of truth.

    Anyway,when I met her she was just “dabbling”
    in drugs.She certainly was not the gaunt
    wasted figure you see before you now.
    It was quite a while back.

  14. Jo Jo

    Somebody needs to switch to decaf.

  15. Adam Smith

    Jo Jo WROTE: Somebody needs to switch to decaf.

    What decaffeinated crack?

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