Filed under: TomKat
In the words of the wise Joey Lawrence… “Whoa.”
Behold this video of Jesus Cruise babbling in fragments about Scientologists being the Chosen Ones, which has been making the rounds on a number of sites; however, the Scientologists keep putting the kibosh on it — so enjoy while you can.
Some nuggets from the nine minutes of nonstop crazy (KSW = Keep Scientology Working; SP = Suppressive Person):
“When you’re a Scientologist, and you drive by an accident, you know you have to do something about it, because you know you’re the only one who can really help.”
“We are the authorities on getting people off drugs. We are the authorities on the mind…. We are the way to happiness. We can bring peace and unite cultures. Now is the time. Being a Scientologist. People are turning to you.”
“If you are a Scientologist, you see things the way they are, in all their glory, in all their complexity… It’s rough and tumble. It’s wild and woolly. It’s a blast. It really is. It is fun. Because damn it, there is nothing better than going out there and fighting the fight, and suddenly you see — boom! — things are better.”
“I want to know that I’ve done everything I can do, every day… I do what I can. And I do it the way I do everything. [LAUGHS] There’s nothing part-of-the way for me.”
Tom Cruise: Self-appointed Clark Kent. Hey, Tom, can you come over? My toilet’s backed up — and you are the ONLY one who can help!
(*GULP* My cats are going to end up flushed down the toilet, aren’t they?)
Posted by Candy ♦ January 15, 2008
At 2:55 pm martini lover said:
you should have warned me candy-i think i looked tom directly in the eyes! it’s all over for me now!
January 15, 2008
At 3:27 pm midevil said:
I dunno, for someone so stuck in the closet, you’d think Scientology would help him address that self-inflicted suppression, since Scientology is the authority on everything.
January 15, 2008
At 4:03 pm Julie said:
Scientolofruits probably frown upon alternative lifestyles, even when it’s The Chosen One.
January 15, 2008
At 4:08 pm midevil said:
But I thought $cientologists have traveled to earth to HELP everyone. If they can’t help guys stuck in the closet, what does that mean???
January 15, 2008
At 4:15 pm martini lover said:
from wiki:
In 1950 Hubbard published Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health, introducing his “science of the mind,” Dianetics. He classified homosexuality as an illness or sexual perversion, citing contemporary psychiatric and psychological textbooks to support his view:
“The sexual pervert (and by this term Dianetics, to be brief, includes any and all forms of deviation in Dynamic II [i.e. sexuality] such as homosexuality, lesbianism, sexual sadism, etc., and all down the catalog of Ellis and Krafft-Ebing) is actually quite ill physically… he is very far from culpable for his condition, but he is also far from normal and extremely dangerous to society…”[1]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_and_Scientology
January 15, 2008
At 4:59 pm suzanne said:
They don’t believe in drugs? I would like to se the medical records of these celebutard followers of Scientology and see how many of them recovered from a broken bone or kidney stone without drugs.
January 15, 2008
At 5:31 pm midevil said:
Well, I guess $cientology just better stick to helping me clean my clogged toilet. If only I hadn’t of shoved all those photos of TomKat down it in the first place!
January 15, 2008
At 5:36 pm Jane said:
For f**ks sake, couldn’t he be taken down
with a tranquilizer bullet shot from a
distance?
He is lost without a script. F**k,
he blathers on saying the same thing for nine minutes, but put a different crazy eyes spin
every few seconds.
And who the fuck is interviewing his crazy ass?
Seriously, this is funny as shit, and I hope it will contribute to his current downfall, but faster and harder!
January 15, 2008
At 6:08 pm Bobofet said:
What a joke he is with that serious expression on his face. Brainwashed. Nut.
January 15, 2008
At 6:55 pm MiMi said:
Yeah, Scientology is totally working for Tom. He’s on his 3rd marriage, his acting career is down the toilet and he can’t convince anyone with even half a brain that he’s not gay.
January 15, 2008
At 7:03 pm midevil said:
Yeah, I’ve never been able to figure that out–he’s an actor, but he can’t convince anyone he’s not gay. Some actor that one, eh.
January 15, 2008
At 8:52 pm Happy Go Lucky said:
What a nutjob. Quick! Someone get him to the
Middle East since, ya know, he can fix everything.
Fucking Blockhead.
January 15, 2008
At 11:45 pm MsTriste said:
If you can’t access the link above, Gawker has a permanent link:
http://gawker.com/5002269/the-cruise-indoctrination-video-scientology-tried-to-suppress
All 9 minutes of pure crazier-than-Britney “number two”.
January 15, 2008
At 1:57 am Sara said:
Wow, I just realized how BATSHIT CRAZY he actually is. Even more so than Britney. She actually looks kind of sane in comparison. His eyes scare me. It reminds me of his character in Magnolia, with the crazy brainwashing. Katie Holmes seemed somewhat normal in Dawson’s Creek, I can’t believe she buys this bullshit. Maybe he’s got bipolar or something, he kind of looks like he’s on a manic high.
January 16, 2008
At 2:16 am lisa said:
I didnt get to watch it all…. i fell asleep at his droning monotonous voice… and for jane who asked who was interviewing him? No-one! He was talking to himself in the mirror!
Jesus Cruise? more like Jesus Christ! What the f**ks going on with this planet that they let this madness be allowed to infiltrate the american way of life!
Im so glad that its banned in this country (Great Britain), that we dont recognise it as a religion….
Keep popping the pills Tom.
January 16, 2008
At 3:40 am Bee Hind said:
God he’s tedious.
January 16, 2008
At 3:46 am jenn said:
He is nuts!! Let’s be glad he spoke out - he is not doing anything to further the cause of scientology. This man has based all his faith on a self help book written by a sci-fi writer. Of course he is a moon bat.
January 16, 2008
At 6:37 am Adrienne said:
Sara, you hit the nail on the head. He really is BATSHIT CRAZY! I think the thing that creeped me out the most was that demonic laugh of his.
Katie Holmes needs to get herself a good lawyer and get out of her contract — oops! marriage, before she winds up as crazy as he is.
January 16, 2008
At 7:50 am Holy Terror said:
ROTFL @ MiMi and Happy Go Lucky!
The mind is a powerful thing. If someone is so convinced of something, their minds will make it happen. It’s positive thinking turned upside down. I really would like to see the results of all the Scientologists “fixing” the world’s problems. Let’s send them in! Darfur, Sudan, Iraq get em out there! The proof is in the doing–and the pudding. Chocolate pudding, yummy. Huh-what was I talking about?
January 16, 2008
At 11:05 am Jenn F. said:
He is one crazy bitch.
As I was recently saying to 14, he thinks he’s saving the world… methinks he’s stuck in his Mission Impossible character role in his own head. I bet he calls himself Ethan while he whacks off. And what exactly IS he doing to “help” people? What has he done? And what’s with the segregatist attitude? “You’re either in…. or you’re out.” What the fuck is that? What the hell is WRONG with this guy? Are we sure Katie’s not going to turn up dead? I’ve had suspicions for a while that Nicole Kidman is not, in fact, even alive. I think she might be a bionic corpse. It would explain how she has the complexion of a 12-year old. Hell, even Botox can’t do a job THAT good! She’s the walking dead. And Katie’s next.
January 16, 2008
At 11:31 am lisa said:
an after thought….
is this the edited version? im sure at the end Tom jumps up and starts shouting straight at the camera ” TOUCH THE SCREEN! TOUCH THE SCREEN! ONLY I CAN HEAL YOU!” at which point various people jump in and grab him before the camera falls over and goes black…
as i said an after thought….
Oh they should replace the MI theme with Loony Tunes instead.
January 16, 2008
At 1:33 pm midevil said:
Hmmm, does Tommy whack off to his own pic? This important question only he can answer.
January 16, 2008
At 6:26 pm Jenn F. said:
You know it, mid.
“oooooh Ethan… ooooh yeah… slap it baby… yeah, slap it HARDER! Kay not so hard… yeah like that… oooohhh Ethan…”
January 16, 2008
At 2:30 am JENNY said:
What is going on with Tom Cruise and his Scientology video? Cocky, arrogant or all-knowing? Taken down from YouTube, see it here.
http://www.webcastr.com/videos/celebs/tom-cruise-now-is-the-time.html
January 18, 2008
At 1:24 pm Bella said:
Bahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa….Batshit crazy INDEED!
January 18, 2008
At 7:33 am Cintha said:
I guess I was wrong that Tom is over rated as an actor. I can see what a stretch acting sane has been! This is more than Scientology, Cult that it may be, still others aren’t this crazy. Can we say sociopopath?
BTW - can ANYONE tell me ANYTHING Tom has done to help people? Drive around looking for accidents? (coming home from the bank)
Why doesn’t any interviewer ask him that? WHAT does he do or donate to help people?
January 20, 2008