Filed under: Tom Cruise, Tom Cruise Art, Valentines
Nothing says LOVE like signing a $5 million contract agreement to pose as a loving companion to a tiny man with a very large ego. This nasty little rumor was reported on Page Six and in the New York Daily News, but of course we know it can’t be true. Obviously Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are madly in love and shove show their affection and devotion to each other every time they make a public appearance. When I think of LOVE,the first romantic vision that flutters into my head is Tom and Katiewith their gushing big grins and persistant public declarations of love. Sigh.
Send this Valentine to your favorite Scientologist today!
Posted by 14 ♦ February 6, 2006
At 11:55 am sweetyme said:
I have enjoyed nearly everything you have posted but your Tom Cruise legs and platform shoes make me laugh out loud.
February 6, 2006
At 12:37 pm d.c. said:
absolutely hilarious!
February 6, 2006
At 1:50 pm DonnaJEM said:
Yikes, that thing looks like the Manson family valentines card.
February 6, 2006
At 4:18 pm Morrigan said:
Eeeek… there’s nothing creepier than your Tom Cruise, 14. But where’s his tail?
February 6, 2006
At 6:11 pm Jen said:
Oh, god, the platforms. That’s hilarious.
February 6, 2006
At 7:18 pm Mel said:
I love it! I’ve disliked Tom Cruise for years, and now he’s finally getting the attention he deserves!!!
February 6, 2006
At 8:00 pm Demon Kitty said:
You are so wonderful. Your art is better than my antidepressants. I can’t wait to send out this valentine.
So much love,
Demon Kitty
February 6, 2006
At 9:08 pm Long Island Irish said:
LOL Xenu blood…perfect!!!
February 6, 2006
At 7:32 am TheIdleReceptionist said:
Tom’s scowl is priceless.
February 7, 2006
At 10:00 am Jane said:
What a HOOT! I don’t know if the contract thing is true but I have suspected it all along. I don’t want to wish ill on anyone BUT if Katie develops PPD, I hope she kicks the **it out of Tom.
February 7, 2006
At 12:36 pm anon said:
loving this!
February 7, 2006
sarah
At 2:34 pm sarah said:
don’t you mean kate holmes ???
February 7, 2006
Corthos
At 4:51 pm Corthos said:
I can’t believe you have that much restraint! I would have gone much higher with the platforms!
February 7, 2006
At 6:34 pm Betty Noir said:
Do you have Katie Holmes’ email, by chance? I have a valentine to send her…
February 7, 2006
Della
At 8:03 pm Della said:
Hmm… hilarious… creepy… it made me laugh and scream all at once!
Although I have to say, Xenu looks pretty pissed off about giving blood!
February 7, 2006
At 11:42 am BrnEyedGirl676 said:
Tom reminds me of a creepy, little toddler - with his stumpy arms and legs. And those outstretched, grabby hands that seem to scream, “Up-py, up-py! Hold me, Mommy!”
Yikes… it makes my uterus go cold!
February 8, 2006
Fug.
At 3:30 am Fug. said:
He’s the devil!
February 9, 2006
Distressed Jeans
At 8:13 am Distressed Jeans said:
So hilarious as usual. I love Paris Hiltons wonky eye and TOm’s platform shoes. Each one is AWESOME!!
Once again, totally brilliant!
February 9, 2006
Damien
At 4:52 pm Damien said:
Toms still totally getting my freaker of the year award!!!
February 9, 2006
At 11:17 am Chansmom said:
Lol! To think that Katie Holmes has his offspring squirming inside her. Ew! In all fairness, I pity the child.
Just in case you missed it. Read Jeannette Walls Scoop. Just this week, Tom has been saying he has “Kate” tucked away, so that no one can get to her until “his child” is born. I’m sure Tom Cruise is the Anti-Christ, or he’s trying hard to be.
Does this smack of craziness. Or is it just me?
Well done, 14!
February 10, 2006
At 6:26 pm Stef said:
This is the funniest one i’ve seen today. I’m definetly coming on this site again. Thanks to Girlfriend magazine for reccomending this site to me!
February 11, 2006
At 6:30 pm surcie said:
Could this BE more perfect!?!
February 11, 2006
At 11:40 am milica said:
What happened with the contest for writing a poem on Tom?
February 17, 2006
At 2:39 am steph said:
i dont know if im stupid or not
wat i do know is that andrew mclauchlan is a stupid bum idiot face poo-head
February 24, 2006
At 1:41 pm libraesque said:
Ahhhhhhahaha, I’m pissing in my pantaloooones. Hey, D.C., it’s funny you should mention the Manson family thing…I just read a CREEPY article that interviewed an ex-head honcho of Scientology that said C. Manson was a Scientologist: http://www.factnet.org/Scientology/celebrities_con.html
March 1, 2006
At 9:03 am AO said:
The tom acts lately is like a devil.
hip hop
May 27, 2006
Steven
At 1:34 am Steven said:
That’s funny,I can’t help comparing this Tom with Impossible Mission ’s Tom ,this is more better.
February 14, 2007