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I’m still experimenting with the concept of celebrity Before and After photos. After seeing Hilary Duff’s sizable new veneers featured in Star magazine’s Knifestyles of the Rich and Famous and reading numerous blogs discussing the subject (see google) it occured to me how similar all of this madness is to an old fashioned circus side show. This is first in my series of Celebrity Freak Show Posters.
Pondering further, I wondered how large Hilary’s toothbrush, err…. scrub brush might be. Does she buy her toothpaste in industrial sized tubs? MEOW! To all you Hilary fans about to flood my in-box with your ire, please remember….I paint the GOSSIP, not the celebrity. Hilary is a pretty girl. A pretty girl with giant teeth.
Posted by 14 ♦ July 19, 2005
gonzo
At 1:46 pm gonzo said:
hey! gigant teeth rock!
July 19, 2005
FingerFood
At 2:18 pm FingerFood said:
You know what they say, “Never look a gift horse in the mouth”
July 19, 2005
At 2:39 pm Dom said:
You actually went a little easy on her, in my humble opinion!
July 19, 2005
At 3:13 pm Amanda said:
Yes, she’s done something horrible to her teeth, but you’ve missed the fact that she’s slowly going skeletal. Here face has morphed from the average and, dare I say, cutely shaped heart that we see here, to the long and sullen form that simply accentuates the teeth.
July 19, 2005
Damien
At 4:01 pm Damien said:
Its great stuff, I think you have really captured the carnival (freak show) poster vibe. Kicking color palette too, bella.
July 19, 2005
At 4:29 pm Use Once & Destroy said:
Now you’re just being mean!
July 19, 2005
At 4:50 pm Use Once & Destroy said:
To clarify, I’m just kidding. This bitch has it coming.
Now I would like to see what kind of freakshow posters 14 can come up with for the cast of “The Wiz.” Especially Nipsey Russell, who I think is still alive.
July 19, 2005
14
At 5:02 pm 14 said:
Mean? Sorry to offend…if you’d like, you can commission me to paint a glorious oil portrait of the lovely Miss Duff. I’ll even paint it in colors to match your sofa. Oh the horror!!
Gossip isn’t very nice, but that’s what I’m painting these days. One day, I shall move on to painting cute fuzzy kittens and Thomas Kinkade-style landscapes.
14
Mistress of Beelzebub
July 19, 2005
At 5:03 pm Knuckles McGillicutty said:
Use Once and Destroy is in LOVE with the pony girl! Get out the sugar cubes!
Adore this one…the colours are beautiful and spooky, and the monkey in the corner—har! Will you do one of the Creature Who Always Has Moisture at the Corners of His Mouth (aka Tom Hanks)?
July 19, 2005
Pagan_Kitty
At 5:03 pm Pagan_Kitty said:
Hilarious!!! Good job!
July 19, 2005
urethrafranklin
At 5:33 pm urethrafranklin said:
I love it…”feed it oats”
Great detail…you are awesomely talented…nevermind your wicked sense of humor!
July 19, 2005
At 6:41 pm Kim said:
This is one for the topiary garden at the Overlook Hotel. Yikes.
July 19, 2005
TSB
At 6:55 pm TSB said:
Anyone else noticed that the equine teeth and slowly dwindling weight have combined to make her face look 15 years older, in a Kim Stewart kinda way?
July 19, 2005
At 8:40 pm Gosia said:
Love it… hehe… she looks older with her new fake teeth - I agree with TSB’s post.
Keep the art coming 14!
July 19, 2005
At 9:56 pm Injenue said:
gosh, you draw really well =) so nice yet so mean! i like!! haha.. my kind of funny.
July 19, 2005
Zell
At 10:19 pm Zell said:
I love this, and it’s only 25 cents to feed her oats. Can’t beat that.
July 19, 2005
At 11:23 pm Allie said:
LMAO!
Your work rules!
July 19, 2005
femme feral
At 12:19 am femme feral said:
I wonder if Haylie is pissed that you left her out!
July 20, 2005
At 6:53 am Karla said:
I have a theory about this. The family manager MADE her get them to make her look more like her sister. IT WORKED! They’re both fugly now.
July 20, 2005
At 7:22 am Sweetthang said:
“A pretty girl with giant teeth.” Hahahahaahhaha!!!
July 20, 2005
Sam
At 7:37 am Sam said:
Your heart’s not in this one. You like her too much. Now if you did the Bush twins…
July 20, 2005
At 8:26 am miss karen said:
omg, dude… brilliant.
July 20, 2005
At 12:23 pm Manuela said:
No, no, no, darling… what I think you MEANT to say is… Those are giant teeth. Giant teeth with a pretty Hilary attached.
Makes much more sense, non?
July 20, 2005
14
At 1:00 pm 14 said:
oh Manuela dear - I adore you!
July 20, 2005
Justine
At 1:23 pm Justine said:
LMFAO!! hahaha. that is so funny! lmao i love your site, it’s hilarious!
July 20, 2005
At 1:31 pm R.R. Anderson said:
Yeah, this one is not mean enough.
in the words of Azeem, “Get up, move faster”
July 20, 2005
At 4:39 pm Viper Tetsu said:
Two theories:
1) Her handlers (keepers?) convinced her to undergo this dental deformation to corner an as-yet-untapped teen-idol merchandising market for Hillary Duff bottle openers. Bad idea. Most of her fans ain’t old enough to be able to legally crack open a Molson on Hillary’s equine choppers.
2) She saw Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and thought that his teeth were like totally cool and that she’d beat those beyotches Lindsay and Paris to the hot new look. Buck-toothed is the new anorexic…
July 20, 2005
cherise
At 11:25 pm cherise said:
Hahahahaaa!!! The teeth! That’s *just* it!
July 20, 2005
mm
At 10:18 am mm said:
There’s something off with that picture ’cause for the first time I didn’t clue in right away. I thought it was Rebecca Romijn-Stamos at first glance, then I sorta saw Hilary…maybe it’s ’cause I caught a glimpse of ‘Femme Fatale’ the other night..?
July 21, 2005
At 12:49 pm giagradiva said:
She has always seemed freakish to me, but for a different reason: Hilary has no neck! Have you noticed? But thanks for pointing out the horse-teeth, too. That chick is a walking sideshow!
July 22, 2005
Lara
At 10:50 am Lara said:
She gained a neck but lost her real, normal teeth. It’s just like The Little Mermaid.
July 24, 2005
Samantha
At 11:41 pm Samantha said:
i don’t think you made them big enough =P
July 24, 2005
At 3:33 pm Hollywood Rag said:
Ha! That is so funny - another classic one 14.
July 25, 2005
oscar
At 7:40 pm oscar said:
HAHAHAHA teeth
July 25, 2005
At 5:20 pm daisy said:
i think her just look bigger cuz she probably lost weight ,her face is thinner and gives her a horsey look
July 27, 2005
morgan
At 9:05 pm morgan said:
daisy: no those are definitly huge veneers
July 27, 2005
At 10:45 pm Lisa said:
Oh no you didn’t!! I thought I was the only one that noticed how completely absurd her new Chicklets looked. They totally changed her look. I think they are so big she can’t close her lips around them. She’s now looking like Piff Diddly. Girl, you rock!
July 28, 2005
Rex Karz
At 10:47 pm Rex Karz said:
Wasn’t Crust Toothpaste one of those Mad Magazine stickers?
August 1, 2005
Cracky
At 6:19 pm Cracky said:
“Buck-toothed is the new anorexic…”
ahh, poetry.
Remember, “Stuff…Hilary Duff.”
Great painting, as usual. I have to second the vote for the Bush spawn.
August 3, 2005
kelly
At 6:55 pm kelly said:
oh how mature.
August 3, 2005
At 8:42 am Talbot said:
This poor kid used to be so cute and uneffected. She now looks like an add for PolyDent. I keep wating for those things to slip out while she talks. It is very sad that a beautiful young girl like Hilary would self mutilate. Lets just hope she stops as those Mr Ed teeth.
August 17, 2005
At 11:28 pm ped alist said:
i would still do her!
September 6, 2005
At 7:58 am Ruby said:
I think she got her cheeks sucked out. This looks like some serious lipo! How else can you change the shape of your face so drastically. The teeth would of looked better on her round face. Now she just looks weird!
September 25, 2005
At 10:43 am Hilary’s #1fan said:
Hilary duff’s fake teeth are awesome. leave her alone its not like if we get something new all the time. You all are just jealous !!!!!!!!!!!!!Big time!
February 12, 2006
At 8:22 pm mariah said:
yes hilary has got sum new teeth but does everyone have 2 kp going on bout it who cares, if she feels comfortable in them than thats all that should matter having hew teeth doesnt autimatically mean that she is a bad person she can still sing can still act and still is a very beautiful person so everyone lay off and get off her back coz im sure all u that has wrote mean stuff bout her probly have bad teeth ya selves so get over ya selves its quit immature and pathetic
April 13, 2006
chez
At 8:31 am chez said:
would u spend 25c of ur own money to feed the bitch!?!? haha no!! Xx
May 3, 2006